Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Randomize
