The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Randomize
