i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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