yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!