Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize