This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
Randomize
