Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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