I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
send nudes
from the living room?
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
