The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
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