I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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