She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
