Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
Randomize
