the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
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