And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
