Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
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