She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Randomize