No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize
