I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
