it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
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