He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
