She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
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