we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
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