Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
Randomize
