Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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