Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Randomize
