Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Randomize
