thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Can you bring me the toilet please
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Randomize