so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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