I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
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