I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Text me some of your sweat
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
