Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
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