I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
