whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Randomize
