so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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