Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
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