i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
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