I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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