He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
