that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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