no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
Randomize
