4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
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