U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
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