You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
