So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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