idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Randomize