garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
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