I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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