my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
