So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Randomize
