you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
I think your dad took our porno
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
